I got these from a UK motorcycle magazine that I read! I found some of them to be pretty funny.

1. Sorry officer, but your mama hates it when Im late.
2. I blacked-out after being buzzed by a UFO, and came out of a trance when I saw your blue lights.
3. I’ve got diaorrhoea, and wanted to get home before I filled my leathers.
4. A gust of wind pushed me over the limit
5. I had to rush my dying hamster to the vet, but he seemed to have fallen off.
6. I thought my speedo wasnt working.
7. Sorry, I thought you fancied a race.
8. I was looking at the rev counter by mistake.
9. Put it on my tab, Pig.
10. How bout best of three?

Link: FastBikes Magazine